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my life from age 0 - 18

i was born in a remote village of UP, India.

my father is a farmer and mother is a housewife.

a lil about my father: he studied till high school and then started farming because of family circumstances. by the time he married my mother and i came into the picture, he had around 3 bigha (~1.3 acres) of his own land from inheritance.

a lil about my mother: she studied till 8th and was married at 19. she's the sweetest woman i've seen so far.

i also have a younger brother.

since my childhood i was quite mischievous.

i used to break a lot of things to make other things. like removing magnets from the old speakers, removing batteries and making diy torches etc.

since my childhood i've been highly curious about almost everything.

soon enough i was admitted in a nearby school.

even though that school was a bit expensive, my father and mother worked extremely hard to manage everything.

i still remember the days when my father used to walk 6 kilometers multiple times a day to buy the inventory for a small grocery shop he used to run. all this because he didn't have a bicycle.

for most of the day, he used to do the farming work and then whenever he got free time, he used to run that shop.

i've seen him loading wheat onto a trolley (~120 quintals) on his own to save money.

i've seen him working in 47 deg in summers and in 5 deg in winters.

as a son who observed his father doing all this, i did the best of what i could — studying hard.

when my tuition teacher used to tell my father how i was scoring perfect 20/20 marks, the smile on my father's face was priceless. it was always a personal victory to me.

in high school, i topped in my district scoring 90% max and was awarded by the Chief Minister of the state — Yogi Adityanath.

i could see how happy my parents were that time.

that was probably the first time my parents and i myself thought that i may end our mediocrity curse.

similarly in 12th i topped in school.

now after my 12th corona started and i was 17 that time.

for me it was obvious what i've to do — preparing for a govt job.

because that was the dream of my parents since the beginning.

at 17, there were only a few govt jobs i could apply for.

and i chose Air Force through NDA (National Defense Academy).

i prepared only using my phone and without any coaching etc and in the first attempt itself, i was able to crack it.

then i had an SSB interview at Allahabad (it wasn't renamed that time).

SSB interview contains two stages: first one is screening and second one is conference.

if you get in in the first one, only then you stay there for 4 days for the rest of the interview rounds and if you clear the conference as well then you'll be considered "recommended" and are sent to the medical phase.

i got in in the screening.

i stayed there for 4-5 days and was out on the conference.

i was really sad thinking how my parents would feel.

when i came home, i got some time to think about career and life and i started thinking "is this really what i want to do?"

for weeks this question kept on circling in my head and at one point of time, i reached a painful conclusion that "i don't wanna do a govt job".

i've always dreamed of it because of my family circumstances and hopes of my parents.

after that i stopped filing forms to any new govt job vacancies and my parents started questioning it.

i didn't have enough courage to tell them about my realization but also i didn't want to force myself into something i didn't want to do.

i thought about this a lot and an idea came into my mind.

one of my masi was a hotel manager in delhi, so i decided to go to delhi, get a job from her reference and then explore other things that i might like.

but i had to tell my parents that i'm going to delhi to prepare for the govt jobs and will do a part time job.

so at the age of 18, i left my home.